SotU: Birds Carrying Twitterwhales

Twitter Whale by Yiying Lu. Text by Douglas Adams.

So. As I type this, Twitter seems to be down. I can’t access it on my iPhone, and online access seems limited to the all-too-familiar Twitterwhale with his unlikely, aviary transportation system.

I can’t tweet about the prewriting I’m engaged in.

To post #amwriting here would be rather fruitless.

But here I am, doing it anyway.

My conclusion is that when Twitter goes down, my Spidey senses tell me to go blog something. This is not a bad thing, my dear inklings, as I have been shoulding to blog many somethings that I haven’t done recently. Which is my way of saying that I’ve been neglecting you all recently, and I know it. Mea culpa.

Anyway. When Twitter’s down, I blog.

What about you? What do you do when Twitter’s down? What do you do when Facebook makes more user interface changes than you want to deal with? What do you do when the intarwebz are fritzing?

Oooooh, we could even pretend there’s an apocalypse if you want. What’s your first step?

Tell, tell!

Baby, You Can Too Write a Novel!

Hey sweet’eart. Missing me? Good, I miss you, too. : )

Life’s got me hustling and bustling enough to keep my blogging fingers busy elsewheres — but I promise an update SOON.

In the meantime, click to read my guest post about life, the universe, and everything, and how You. Are. Enough.

42, y’all. BANGERANG.

10 Things I’d Rather Do Than Fight a Zombie Elf

 

  

 This post is brought to you by the letter “Z” and was inspired by Consortium Books‘ upcoming short story e-zine, Consortium of Worlds, Vol. 1 (in which you can read my zombie elf short story “Dead Reconning”). 

  
 

10 Things I’d Rather Do Than Fight a Zombie Elf

In random order:

  1. Fight a living elf
  2. Make out with a non-sparkling vampire
    We all know how that would end, and it doesn’t involve vampiric vegetarianism.
  3. Take afternoon tea with Gothmog (“Elephant Man” orc in LoTR film The Return of the King)
    Talk about one lump or two. Have you seen that guy’s face?!
  4. Engage in a Worst Poetry Contest with a Vogon
    Internal hemorrhaging, anyone?
  5. Listen to Rebecca Black’s “Friday” until my ears bleed
  6. Work out to Richard Simmons’s Disco Sweat
  7. Play hide-and-seek with Darth Vader
    “The stupidity is strong with this one.”
  8. Clean the cats’ litterboxes
  9. Catch a dragon by the toe
    If he hollers, you’re dead. Because he breathes fire and all.
  10. Try to write a novel without any coffee

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What about you? What would you rather do than fight an undead zombie elf?

Zombie Courtney created with “George A. Romero’s App of the Dead” app for iPhone.