Don’t Forget Your Porn Bucket
So, my husband works in hardwood flooring. He comes home with stories to amuse me. In related news, dialects are cramazing. World, never stop being you.
So, my husband works in hardwood flooring. A customer comes into the store, and the following exchange takes place between the customer and Ed’s co-worker. We’ll call the co-worker Adam and the customer Greg.
Adam: What can we do for ya?
Greg: Do y’all have any porn buckets?
Adam (stares): Do we have what?
Greg: Porn buckets. You got any?
Adam: I…I don’t understand. What?
Greg: PORRRRN buckets.
Adam: Dude, this is hardwood (stifles snort) flooring. We don’t have anything about porn here.
Greg: Flooring! Yes! That’s why I’m here — I need porn buckets!
Adam: Um…okay. What do you want to…um…do with these buckets?
Greg: Pour the finish in the bucket and then pour it over the floor.
Adam: Oh. Pouring buckets?
Greg: Yeah! Porn buckets!
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Don’t do drugs, kids.