In Which I Don’t Understand America

Me (writing in baby book): Hey, where did you go to kindergarten?

Ed: Sabin Elementary School.

Me: …

Ed: What?

Me: You went to kindergarten at elementary school?

Ed: Yeah…why?

Me: Why didn’t you go to kindergarten at…oh, I dunno…a kindergarten?

Ed: …That’s where you go to kindergarten. At school.

Me: The kindergarten is attached to the elementary school?

Ed: It’s part of the school. Haven’t you ever heard the term “K through 12,” or “K through 6”? Kindergarten through 12th grade, 6th grade?

Me: Yeah, but I didn’t know that meant the kindergarten is part of the school.

Ed: …

Me: Don’t look at me like I’m crazy. What about pre-k?

Ed: That’s before kindergarten.

Me: …

Ed: That’s why it’s “pre-.”

Me: Oh for tuna.

Ed: Well, you asked.

Me: Okay, so what about pre-school?

Ed: That’s before kindergarten, too.

Me: But it doesn’t make any sense! Shouldn’t the sequence be: pre-k, kindergarten, pre-school, 1st grade? Since 1st grade is the first time they’re actually in school?

Ed: Look, I can’t help it. There’s 1st grade, but kindergarten is considered the first grade.

Me: I don’t understand this country at all.

Fling this post into the ether of internetted winds, that it might implant itself in a bazillion other consciousnesses and hasten the onset of my world dominion. ...Wait -- did I say that out loud?Buffer this page
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